Xanax For Sale

Benrik Day 12 asks to define one's "type." I always thought I had this one pinned down. He was to be tall, dark, and handsome, with a killer smile, very sexy, great wit, intelligent but not stuffy, and had to make me laugh harder than anyone I knew. Simple, no? But it seems that time and experience have taken a toll on such prerequisites. Tall, dark, and handsome are nice characteristics, but are not all that necessary. Killer smiles still make me melt, but what's behind the smile intrigues me more. Wit, intelligence, sexiness, and humor are still required and are non-negotiable. Then there are the other things that I've now come to need. I want a boy who returns my phone calls in a timely manner. I want a boy who lives up to his word and doesn't promise me unrealistic tomorrows. The boy should tell the truth, even if it's going to hurt, instead of playing games. He should be supportive of me and my dreams, as I will do the same for him. He should be my partner, not leader, in our journey together. Perhaps this is too much to ask. It is a bit limiting, but should we lower our expectations in response? I think not.

My date with A. last night was no less than perfect. He was everything I expected and more. It was the sort of date that whisked by before our eyes, with us only stopping to catch our breath in conversation and taking a sec to glance at each other before saying sweet things. Funniest moments: 1. Writing a one-napkin essay to each other on our thoughts of the first hour of the evening. 2. While eating edamame, shooting myself in the face with a soybean. 3. A. watching me reply to all the text messages from my sister and D. asking, "is he cute?" "update!" "do you want me to bail you out?" Sweetest moments: 1. What he wrote on the napkin. 2. A. telling me that he hasn't had this much fun in the 8 months that he's been here. 3. A. declaring "I want to see you" and I agreeing wholeheartedly after laughing at him for a good 5 minutes. Worst moment: Realizing that what seemed to be only a couple of hours was actually 7 hours and it was closing time. Best moment: 1. Kissing him in the cold night air and not wanting to let go. 2. Knowing that this is only the beginning.

Talked to the new boy for another few hours (!) last night. He is funny, smart, and has a wicked cd collection. I am intrigued by the lack of awkward silences. I am also so freaking excited about meeting up with him tonight (and so not excited about the zit I seemed to have gotten overnight). Of course I don't want to expect too much because that only leads to unfulfilled fantasies, but he just sounds lovely. Meanwhile, meet Jonas for day 10 of Benrik. Oh, and I mailed absentee's key back to him.

Did I tell you about the cute boy that called last night? Did I tell you we talked for hours? Did I tell you about the millions of things we have in common, including a love for the D? Did I tell you how he made me laugh? Did I tell you that we're going out this weekend? Oh? Well now you know...

1.9.2004 | Belated Benrik I have been slacking on the Benrik updates! Day 5: I placed an "out of order" sign on my neighborhood's mailbox. It was ripped off immediately. Fuckers. Day 6: I wrote the first sentence to my debut novel, which is a variation of this. Day 7: Masturbated to very odd fantasy on page of Day 7. I don't know, but camping just doesn't cut it with me. Day 8: Cut out caffeine for the day. That was all I could handle. Developed headache instantly. Day 9: Do something before breakfast day - and that was laundry. Actually, I don't really eat breakfast so I pretty much do everything before breakfast until lunch comes around.