mingaling » stupid

I do

mingaling — Thu, 25 Mar 2010 02:33:44 +0000

Cashier: “What does your shirt say?”

Me: “Oh, it says I support same-sex marriage.”

C: “You DO?!”

Me: “I just ran out of other shirts.”

longest. pause. ever.

Me: “Of course I do.”

C: “Oh… Cute baby.”

I’ve been an asshole

mingaling — Thu, 29 Jan 2009 18:56:47 +0000

Dear Blog,

I’ve been an asshole. I’ve been taking you for granted, cheating on you with with things like Twitter and Facebook, nesting in the home, and probably playing too much Animal Crossing.

But you know I’ve been trying, right? I mean, I have drafts. DRAFTS for god’s sake. I never think before I write, so give me some credit.

I’ll try not to be such a prick.

Smooches,
Mingaling

You may have a problem if…

mingaling — Tue, 26 Aug 2008 15:09:14 +0000

… you’re storing wine in your bra. Just saying.

From the halls of stupid inventions, I present to you the WineRack.

Netflix eliminating profiles

mingaling — Thu, 19 Jun 2008 15:46:41 +0000

I got this email from Netflix yesterday:

Honestly, this is the only distinguishing feature that sets Netflix apart from Blockbuster, etc. The Mr. and I can keep our respective horror movies and romantic period dramas apart, yet both get them at the same time in our package deal. And what about all of the movies separated in queues as of now? Their advice: print out all your other queues and enter each movie one at a time. FUCK YOU. Is this what they’re calling “improving the user experience”? Really?

Bye bye, Netflix. A brilliantly stupid move on your part.

your resident street urchin

mingaling — Mon, 19 May 2008 18:54:10 +0000

As I’m walking to my office building from the parking lot and realize I have a hole in the side of my shoe. Yep, a giant hole where I can clearly see my pedicure from here. WTF – how does this happen?

What’s next? Using my shirt to blow my nose? And these were my fave go-to shoes. Ugh… off to shopping…

Okay, okay, I GET IT

mingaling — Thu, 06 Sep 2007 20:25:06 +0000

I know it’s pretty much impossible to avoid comments when making popcorn in the office, but when I made one of my favorite delicious mini-bags of kettle corn, no less than 5 people ran up to tell me this.

Fine, I get it – MORE FOR ME.

Let Freedom Ring

mingaling — Fri, 06 Jul 2007 13:21:14 +0000

An update for everyone (thanks for being so concerned! love you guys!):

Independence Day was not only a day of celebrating the freedom and rights we enjoy as a country. It was also the day my bowels released petrified poop. Yes, I pooped! Twice! It only hurt a little!

Freedom = achieved.

Well poop.

mingaling — Tue, 03 Jul 2007 15:03:40 +0000

Or not.

I haven’t pooped in 5 days. I eat a well-balanced diet (um… well, at least lately), have been taking fiber supplements daily, and I still got nada. No rumblings, no fake-outs, no cramps… nothing.

I’m kinda scared at this point.

UPDATE

Unnecessary heart attack. Thanks DDS!

mingaling — Thu, 22 Mar 2007 15:45:50 +0000

(cross posted from flickr)

I tried to change my address. They said my license was suspended. I fought with one lady about it (apparently they “notified me in April 2006, ” which is crap). I’ve never been pulled over or given a ticket in Georgia, nor have I received one anywhere during the last 4 years.

I got transferred to another department to verify my social security number. This lady was nicer, explaining to me that the mix-up may have been due to my name change when I got divorced and filed for a new social security card.

Of course both the divorce and name change happened a whole year BEFORE I ever stepped foot in the state of Georgia, but what do I know…

Does the carpet match the drapes?

mingaling — Thu, 11 Jan 2007 23:11:56 +0000

My favorite parts are "Due to the holiday season we’re unable to ship internationally" (because, you know, the holidays are their busiest time) and "I also came up with a hot pink color not just for special occasions" (because what could be more special than a hot pink muff?). Mmmhmm…

is your betty ready?